Saturday, March 23, 2013


yeah yeah .. what a day !
the most precious, enjoyable, meaningful 24 hours of my lifetime !
it's not such a big thing, but since it's the very first time, so I marked as the very unforgettable memories.

what is it, dude?! it's dota competition! it just held here in my college organised by a organization that they call themselves "ajk cluster". it's kinda interesting and i'm totally holy excited with that event. so I made a team with my friends as we often play together every weekend under the name "fff" which is stand for fuckingfastfinger. actually I got the name somewhere else but I think it doesn't matter huh I borrow the name just for this small tournament.

ezra, jackson pang, wan and zuhdi... yeah! that's my team! and myself, gamers here doesn't call my name, they call me "dirty". it's a very long story how i got that name. but just to know, everyone know me as "dirty" ! muahaha..sounds like a pro huh? you have to believe it!

the competition was in two stages; group standing and knockout phase (semi-final and final). and there's only 2 prizes to be won; "king of time" which is the winner is the most shortest or fastest game end among all games, and "king of match" in other word win at final. so our team get through the group standing without even lose a game! kinda easy i think @@

then we went to semi-final versus the team by name "noobies". and we won it :)
and the moment that all had been waited, THE FINAL versus "OuterHeaven". the final was in rounds (games). if the first round we won, then 2nd round lose, so the 3rd to decide the winner. but what a lucky or maybe our team are definitely pro, we won for the first and second round!!! i didn't expect it would be that easy. and we won the competition! woohoo !!!

we won the "king of match" however the "OuterHeaven" take the "king of time" as they have the fastest game which ends in 14 minutes during group standing. my team even tried to break the record, but we didn't make it, we just made it for 17 minutes.

its ok. we still won! and today, when I go outside take a walk, some of people say hi to me, "woi, I heard that 'dirty' bully in final!" ...haha, now im getting famous :DD

still, im gonna miss that moment, my friends. my teammate. everything that happen at that time. it's totally unforgettable. since less than one month we gonna end our study here, and sure we'll be separated through every state, as some of us from johor, kedah, and i'm from selangor.. sad case.

guys... ezra, jackson pang, wan, zuhdi, irfan, saiful, rhude, aairy, hadi and everyone that were there during the competition..if you reading this, whenever it is... i miss you guys :) whenever you guys play dota or dota 2 or LoL or HoN ...remember me, "dirty" :DD

Wednesday, March 20, 2013


hurm ...
such a long time since this blog remained silence without a post.
hehe ~
something changed huh? i have a lot to post, they just stuck in my mind. wait my fingers in good mood to type all those stuff okay.
and...since i met my ms. cadburry, i guess, i'd like to write everything now in english :)
erm, maybe not everything, but most.
so, see ya :)


it's happening again
whatever i do
whatever i feel
it's worthless

i'm tired. i'm done. i'm out of it. that's what i mumbling about. but that's not what whispered by my heart.

i'm just looking for something that maybe i lack of it. something that people said it makes your life brighter. something that the motivator said, one of five most expensive and precious things in the world that we must appreciate.

"relax bro. maybe is not now. you should focus on the other things first"

"you need something to motivate yourself"

"it's not wrong to like someone, but don't let it ruin your life, there might something that more important"

"it's time to enjoy yourself, teenagers come only once in life"

"if you failed, cool.. there a lot more girls outside there"

it's not exactly what i'm searching for 24 hour per day of my life. but i can't deny myself if the feelings come. and the thing that i might never felt before.

i have no idea what to write anymore ...
this things sucks.

i just feel dumb, bullshit. it just happened today, for the fourth time in my life.

i like a girl, i approach slowly, i planned my move step by step, i arranged sentences words by words.

and when the time is come, when i'm about to express the feelings, everything ...
then ...

sms : "hey, guess what?? he told me he likes me!! omg! i can't wait to meet him tomorrow! "

"sorry, we're just 'couple' last week"

"you know what? he call me and asked if i willing to marry her after study. kinda shock huh. yeah i like him, but it sounds too early"

facebook notification : "<she> now is in relationship with @#$%$#"

i have shit on my face.
i'm too weak!

"yeah, good for you. congrats!"  <== the worse action i can made, such a stupid i am!

yeah, that's what i usually do, cry inside and make that fucking spongebob's fake smile :)